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Published: 1st Oct 2014, 1:35 PM

Persona Non Sequitur

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woohooligan 1st Oct 2014, 1:35 PM
woohooligan Being smug is fun! And so easy to do! All you gotta do is find a good non sequitur. For example, if a guy runs out of the research hospital shouting "we did it! We did it! We cured cancer!", you just look him in the eye and you say "well, do you know what the glycemic index of a banana is? Do you, punk?! I thought not. So how can you say you care about people's health?!" ... "but... canc-" -"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT, mister haven't memorized the glycemic index catalog".

It's just like Renes Descartes said, "cogito ergo banana", roughly translated, "I think therefore fruitcake!" But Descartes was wrong, because the cake is a lie!

Or more to the point, your ability to identify arbitrary blobs of pastel colors on a map of nations is about as useful to your daily life as Helen Keller's kaleidoscope (oh, the pretty, pretty colors)! Unless you truly believe that one day some crazed crack addict will blow your brains out unless you know the longitude and latitude of Jellystone National Park, I think you're pretty safe. I first heard this load of bull years ago from Deepak Chopra of all people. I often hear it trotted out when someone wants to feel superior, with the added bonus of shaming us dumb Americans who're too busy shooting guns in the air and cramming bacon in our maw to pick up a book.

Thanks to Jeff Houser for backing our ebook Kickstarter! I was originally going to do some kind of guitar-playing gag for your cameo, but I thought you might enjoy this one too, so here it is. :D

The bonus panel will be available for about a week until the next comic is posted. The previous bonus panels and alternate endings will be made available after we finish the Kickstarter rewards and launch our Patreon page!

Also, congratulations to Mark Stokes whose Zombie Boy Kickstarter is now 65% funded with two whole weeks remaining!

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